One Flight Down

I feel like today was one of the worst days ever.
I don't feel well,

And this huge chapter in my life is closing-
I can feel it,
Rumbling under my feet.

I have no ties to this place anymore.






I drive the city streets-
And they don't look the same.
And where do you go when everything has changed?

And I'm starting to wonder if it's God saying

"Hey, let's get out."
And I'm wanting to take his hand.

She said,
I'm running away from my fear...

But maybe fear's right
And I shouldn't be here.
And if that's not the case-

How do I settle the life that I'm living in now?

I don't even want it anymore.


The thing that I don't understand,
Is I'm supposed to be kicked and THEN

Be a friend?

I don't do that well.
I don't take the bitter end...of things...
Well.

And condescendingly,
I am told-
That people wouldn't put up with me?

Forget that.
I can find many people,
Who will love me,
Just as I am...

And stand by me one hundred percent.

And I wouldn't take back the words that I said...

I'd say them all over again.


I think that
What people don't want to see is truth.
That's what I think.
They call you fake if you don't follow their rules...

Like they are the God,
They don't even know.

And when did my life,
Fall right through my hands?
And when did they start making my plans?

These words are worth the repercussions...
So I stand in them and by them
Until the end.

I'm not hiding.

And when the day comes...
You can find me...

And I'll still be here, right here
Right here-just who I am.

And I'm not taming my emotions,
Because I'm justified.
I am justified
In the way I feel.

And I feel betrayed...
And I feel let down...

And I'm the only one who gets in trouble for their actions.
Because I'm the only one who tells the truth.

And that's okay by me.
Because I have enough courage to strap it to my back and carry it.

I have a spine.
And I'll never run back,
To the hands that have slapped me
Forever!

She has no right,
To say that she doesn't agree where I put my passion,
When she's beat me down to this level.
And she's never been there-
For me,
So why would I have ears that listen?

That's hilarious-
She thinks of herself as an example...

As she tries to justify the things she's done.
But she can't
And in my eyes...
It'll never matter...

Because it can't be changed.

And my arms...
May open up with forgiveness tomorrow,
But I don't play the game of

"I'm only saying sorry if you grovel"
Thing.

Forget that.

I'm never asking for forgiveness
Of people that have malice in their hearts.

I'll be vicious,
Before I'll ever lose my self respect again.

I get "self righteous" alot.

Well-
It's coming from the same people,
WHAT?

If I'm not on the ground spitting up blood
While you're kicking me in the sides-
I'm SELF RIGHTEOUS?

No.
I'd beg a person that was WORTH it...

But a person that was would never make me beg

SLAP A FACE ON ALL OF THEM

They are the same person.
And I've apologized enough over the years.

And one drop of poison,
Will taint the whole bunch.

It's been made evident.
So-

Am I stubborn for not responding for the millionth time?
No.

I care about my heart.

And I refuse to be broken again.

So I'm escaping this...

And running from this town.

And if that's running away from my problems;

Well..
So be it.