Betrayal in Every Form of the Word

Sprawls quickly across my journal pages,

And I'm left,
After,
With a pounding heart full of rage.

I had to cut my own heart out with him.
I had to leave and be left,
Because he was too much of a coward to do it all.
So, here I am...broken and alone...

Because they weren't real friends;
I was expendable
And she's given my shoes to fill.

Apparently my position could be offered up
To anyone who comes along.

Because he leads
And they follow

And his spineless,
Word is law.
Even though he's done nothing worthy of leading.

And then,
If they do come around,
All they want is to take me out.

Am I not worth more than that?
And where were YOU
When I was so sick that I couldn't even get up off the couch?

And they call you up
And you FEEL LUCKY
To be asked to be around.

And your self worth goes down the tubes.

And you make a friend,
With an honest
Heart,

But she's too busy
Getting her heart blended by
The same bunch
That she'll slap wrists

To anyone that says anything negative to them

Even though SHE'S
Being beaten by them,
And fooled by their hypocrisy.

And the real friend,
Gets told to hold her tongue.

And told that
"No one would put up with that..."

WHY?
BECAUSE IT'S REAL?

She'd much rather run back to fake friends,
And defend the judge and jury

Than stand by real friends
When the water gets hot.

And my heart
Is just supposed to bounce back to trust
After all of that?

I'm sorry.

I am real...
Though so often told,
I was fake.

No. My heart is broken,
AND THAT IS REAL.

My words are POISON
And they are REAL.

Is this REAL enough for you now?


And then,
She only comes around when she wants something-

Like I'm some kind of Fountain of Knowledge.

But never asks about how MY heart is doing!

Because that's not something we talk about.

It's always about everyone else's heartbreak.

And what about mine?
What about the fact that I lost everyone?
Not just one person!

I lost someone who was supposed to be my soul mate.
My best friend...
All of my boys,

Everything!

And no one was there to care.

I had to cope
And pick up the pieces.

Because everyone was too busy worrying about their OWN heartbreak.

And once again,

I don't do what they say and I'm left alone?

What good is their friendship if I can't be ME?!

It is nothing.


And that is the worst feeling in the world.
It's the loneliest place to be,
When the people you want to love-
Just knock you down.
And the people that were supposed to be there forever
Are no longer around.